Confession time. I have trouble relaxing. I always feel like I need to be doing something. Even when I am “relaxing”, my mind is always racing. When I have down time, I have a tendency to occupy it with checking e-mail and social media, or playing Spider Solitaire. It is not easy to free my mind and just reflect and/or meditate.
The other day, a student was telling me about his experience with sensory deprivation—i.e., floatation therapy. There is a trend of floatation centers opening around the country. Essentially, it involves floating in salt water that is maintained at body temperature in a pitch-black, sound-proof, pod. Sounds great! I can certainly see the potential benefits, but…. The sessions last an hour or more. They are costly. And they last an hour or more. My dilemma is that I don’t allow myself the opportunity to relax.
Friday, my daughter was off from school (Spring Break starts Monday, why not schedule conferences?), my finals week was over, and grades were submitted. So, I took advantage of the opportunity and took her to see Beauty and the Beast. We had a long overdue daddy-daughter date—movie, popcorn, and a trip to the frozen yogurt shop after the movie (a challenge, given I am working on losing body fat). It was a great time. I got to relax with my sweet little girl!
It was a much-needed break, but now it is Spring Break, and I have to let go of all that I “need” to do and relax. Why should this be so hard?? Relaxation should come easy. Unfortunately, we have so conditioned ourselves to always be on the go—always doing something.
It has been a struggle for me to take a simple 15-minute break to “hit the pause button” (Jim Harshaw) and disengage myself in a brief period of prayerful reflection and meditation. This can be blamed, in part, on my teaching schedule (back-to-back 1:50-minute lectures at 10 and 12 on Tuesdays and Thursdays). On these days, it is: rush to get the kids off to school, drive and hour+ to campus, get prepped for class, teach, eat lunch at 2 PM, catch up on e-mail, etc., drive home, workout, dinner, sports practices, bed…. Now, there are numerous issues with playing the blame game. First, the current teaching schedule is only two days out of the week. Second, there is time in here for a 15-minute pause. The problem is me! I have chosen (when I have not paused) to not take the time. Like much of what I write about, it is a choice. It is a matter of habit.
I should look forward to relaxing. I get to hit the pause button often throughout the day. It is a matter of choosing to do so. I already start the day with journaling—a practice that is intended to set the course for my day. I get the opportunity to follow this up with periodic breaks throughout the day.
–My commute is an hour (each way). Surely, I can turn off the radio for at least 15 minutes and collect my thoughts. (Though, side note, Siri doesn’t do a great job when I try to record my ideas.)
–I can turn off electronics for 15 minutes (especially when I am eating).
–I can find a quiet place to sit with my eyes closed for 15 minutes.
–etc.
There is always opportunity. It is only 15 minutes, after all! I just consciously have to stop. I get to pause midday to relax my breathing, pray, meditate, listen to my thoughts, focus, and just hit the emotional reset. The opportunity is there. The choice is mine. (And maybe I can spring for a floatation session?)
Carpe momento!