Life doesn’t always go the way we planned. Sometimes we get what we want. Sometimes we don’t. We always, however, get what we need. It sounds a bit cliché, but I am confident that this is true.
When we find ourselves in those circumstances that are not quite what we planned or hoped for, we must pause and evaluate the situation. Consider from where we have come, but focus on were we are in the moment. Don’t worry about tomorrow. Think about what you are doing now.
As part of your growth plan, you should have considered our values and drafted a mission statement. (If you haven’t, take time to do so.) Ask yourself: “Is the path I am on consistent with my values and mission?” Consider your goals. Is your path leading you in the direction of these? If not, what needs to change? (As well, ask: “Are these the right goals?”)
When our circumstances are abruptly changed, as they often are, we need to ask: “Why?” More specifically, “What is the opportunity here?” Yes. It might seem like a crappy situation in which you have found yourself, but it is an opportunity. It is an opportunity to grow. It is also an opportunity to learn what you are capable of doing. It is an opportunity to try something new—and perhaps greater than what you were previously doing. It might even be an opportunity to do something you were afraid to do. Moreover, it is an opportunity to be grateful.
Everyone’s circumstances are different. There is really no bullet list I can provide here. Suffice it to say you need to own your circumstances. Consider them from the perspective of the dimensions of well-centered fitness—Spiritual, Physical, Intellectual, Emotional, and Social. Your circumstance may affect only one or a couple of these, but there will be some affect. It may not even have the greatest affect on you personally. Indeed, it is most likely that your situation may have a compounding affect on others. Consider how and what this means for you and the others involved.
Hind-sight is, indeed, 20/20. Looking back, there are surely countless times to which one can reflect and see that circumstances didn’t work out the way we planned, but they certainly worked for the good in ways we could never have anticipated. You are, perhaps, on the cusp of such a time. Such is a time for patience, optimism, and trust.
A friend commented this morning that he got married when he was “18 and stupid”. Fifty-two years later, he is still happily married. I called to question his “stupidity”. The child they had a year later and the subsequent grandchildren are a tribute to my friends’ “stupidity”. Clearly, they would never go back to correct their stupidity. To do so would erase 52 blessed years.
I really do not like the question: “If you could go back in time and change one thing…?” No matter what you have done or experienced in your life, it has brought you to where you are right now. Where you are today may not be such a great place as a result. That doesn’t matter. What matters is what your do next. You have a choice. You have an opportunity to make tomorrow better. Carpe momento!
Your “stupidity” might have brought you to where you are, but it is where your need to be this moment for tomorrow to be better. Be optimistic! Be adventurous! Embrace the opportunity!
“Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, this time more intelligently.”—Henry Ford