I saw a short video today about a trend started by a bar in St. Petersburg, FL. A sign in the ladies’ room instructs women who are on a bad date or feeling unsafe to order an “Angel shot”. Doing so, the bartender will escort you to your car. Order it on ice, the bartender will call a taxi or Uber. Order it with a lime, and the bartender will call the police. Now, I believe the bar owner has good intentions. I don’t mean to minimize this, at all. In fact, I commend the bar owner for caring. I do struggle with the concept, though, much like I struggle with the trend of wearing a safety pin to indicate that you are “safe with me”. (Again, a well meaning effort.) The problem with these are that they carry little weight, and, personally, I don’t think they are effective or necessary.
First, the drink order seems a bit complicated to remember. What every happened to just asking the bartender for “help”? I presume it is to prevent the problem from escalating? But, would that not be the case as soon as the bartender begins to escort the woman out of the bar? As well, it would not be long until the sleazy date learns of the “Angel shot” and knows what it means—so, again, “help”??
Second, we need to be looking out for others, and our actions will speak of our being “safe”. Personally, if someone is being verbally or physically attacked, one will not need to see a safety pin on my chest or order a drink to know they are safe. I will act. The person will know that I am a “friend” because I will get involved.
We need to stand up for others. If someone looks like they are struggling with the person they are with, why not just walk up like you are an old friend and ask how they are? If they need help, they will play along. If you misread the situation, well, it might be a little embarrassing, but, in most cases, the person will respect what you were trying to do and play along anyhow. If you look like a fool, so what? You did the right thing. Laugh it off. The risk of making a fool of yourself far outweighs the risk of someone being harmed.
I am appalled by the number of videos I see of someone being bullied or assaulted and countless people are just standing around and/or filming it. What is wrong with people??
I understand that we may feel powerless. We may fear being harmed. There may be serious risk of harm. Nonetheless, we must to something. Instead of using the camera app, use the phone for what it is intended and call 911! If you are physically capable, step it. I suspect the bully or jerk who assaulting a woman is not as tough as they think they are. They might act all badass—until someone more badass steps up. Chances are the bully is only afraid of someone who is not afraid of them. Just do something!!!
Be aware when you are out and about. Look for circumstances that are out of the ordinary. If something doesn’t look quite right, step in. An angel does not come in a shot glass or wear a safety pin. An angel doesn’t necessarily have wings. An angel is, however, a guardian. An angel helps.
Don’t stand by while someone asks for an “Angel shot”. Be that person’s angel.
Rape, abuse, bullying, etc. are all serious problems in our society, but being a bystander is far worse in my opinion. Act as you are able. Carpe momento!