Month: June 2017

Sports movies are often about coming together as a team and accepting others who are “different”.  Two such movies come to mind (though there are many more).  Remember the Titans is one of the classics.  American Wrestler: The Wizard is newer movie that I just recently watched for the first time (I say “first” because I know it is a movie I can watch again and again).

Remember the Titans depicts a time of racial tension when T.C. Williams High School in Alexandria, Virginia, was being desegregated.  It is full of scenes that inspire greatness and community.  One of my favorite scenes is when Julius Campbell visit Gerry Bertier in the hospital after a car accident injured Gerry preventing him from playing in the championship.  The nurse attempts to prevent Julius from visiting, telling him that “Only kin’s allowed in here.”  Julius responds: “Alice, are you blind?  Don’t you see the family resemblance?  That’s my brother.”

And, of course, there is Coach Boone’s speech at Gettysburg:

“This is where they fought the battle of Gettysburg. Fifty thousand men died right here on this field, fighting the same fight that we are still fighting among ourselves today. This green field right here, painted red, bubblin’ with the blood of young boys. Smoke and hot lead pouring right through their bodies. Listen to their souls, men. I killed my brother with malice in my heart. Hatred destroyed my family. You listen, and you take a lesson from the dead. If we don’t come together right now on this hallowed ground, we too will be destroyed, just like they were. I don’t care if you like each other of not, but you will respect each other. And maybe… I don’t know, maybe we’ll learn to play this game like men.”

And in the final scenes when an older Sheryl Yost says: “People say that it can’t work, black and white. Here, we make it work every day. We still have our disagreements, of course, but before we reach for hate, always, always, we remember the Titans.”

The movie American Wrestler: The Wizard is a timely movie (intentionally, no doubt).  It is about the struggle for acceptance by a teenage Iranian immigrant in Petaluma, California in 1980—at the height of the Hostage Crisis in Iran.  He finds his place among the floundering wrestling team and, despite all the hostility, becomes a leader on the team and inspires them to rise to the occasion.  The main character, Ali, works hard to prove himself as a person and as a wrestler.  I will have to watch the movie a few more times to latch on to some memorable quotes, but it is indeed an inspiring movie and one that should give us pause as we leap to judge others based on labels.  Life is a struggle for acceptance.  Perhaps, it appears easier for some to find acceptance, but, in reality, it is a struggle for everyone.  We must always remember to strive to make our mark as who we are and not what others want us to be.  Hostility cannot be requited with hostility.  Hostility is met with resolve and demonstration of one’s unique purpose.

Be your best today; be better tomorrow.

Carpe momento!

Image source: http://www.chasingthefrog.com/reelfaces/rememberthetitans/tmpc.jpg

“Let me tell you something kid; Everybody gets one chance to do something great. Most people never take the chance, either because they’re too scared, or they don’t recognize it when it spits on their shoes.”—‘The Babe’ in Sandlot

I would not say that everybody only gets one chance to do something great, but the movie Sandlot does teach us a great lesson: take advantage of the opportunity.  “The Babe” was correct in says that “most people never take the chance, either because they’re too scared, or they don’t recognize it when it spits on their shoes.”  We tend to fail to seize the moment—to carpe momento.  It is a pity.

Sandlot is no one of my go-to personally motivating sports films, but it is a great movie and the above quotation was suggested by a friend when I asked the question: “What is your favorite, most inspiring, sports movie and scene?”  So, why not include it in the series?  In its light-hearted way, the movie does encourage us to go for it (think of the scene where Smalls fakes drowning to steal a kiss from the lifeguard—worth getting kicked out of the pool for the summer!).

Do you have a dream of greatness?  What is holding you back?  (Don’t make me come spit on your shoes!)  Now is your moment to be (extra)ordinary.  Don’t think that greatness is beyond your reach.  Greatness is achieved within our circle of influence.  The opportunity to do something great is always present.  Greatness is within all of us.

Carpe momento!!

 

“No one ever learned to swim by reading a book.”—James C. Hunter, The World’s Most Powerful Leadership Principle

I am a proponent of reading daily (at least 30 minutes of focused reading a day), but I don’t expect that change is going to come simply by reading a book.  Change comes only through action.  Reading expands our thinking and gives ideas.  Reading inspires growth, but it does not produce anything.

In the late 1970s, James O. Prochaska and Carlo Di Clemente developed the basis for the Transtheoretical Model (TTM) of behavioral change.  TTM suggests that the processes of change guide one through five stages of change: precontemplation, contemplation, preparation, action, and maintenance.  Obviously, the keys to lasting change lie in action and maintenance.  Wishing to change only lands us in the contemplation stage.  Reading a book, which certainly beneficial, brings one to the preparation stage.  Reading can give us the tools and the information necessary to change, but change does not come without action.

James C. Hunter writes about Servant Leadership when he makes the statement about learning to swim.  Leadership comes in leading.  Change comes in changing. 

In the Prologue to his book, The World’s Most Powerful Leadership Principle, Hunter asks three questions that require consideration before continuing (and I would suggest need to be asked before pursuing any change):

“1. Are you truly committed to personal continuous improvement…? ….

2. Can your ego handle receiving feedback, even emotionally painful feedback, from others….

3. Are you willing to do the necessary work, take the necessary risks, and suffer the necessary pain in order to close the gaps between where you currently are… and where your need to be…?” (p. 24).

A mistake in reading Napoleon Hill’s Think and Grow Rich is that all one needs to do is will for the benefits to come.  The title alone makes me think of Rodin’s “The Thinker” in the movie, Night at the Museum—“I’m thinking. I’m thinking….”  The thinking part is only the essential beginning.  Preparation and Action must follow, and, as experience tells us, Maintenance of the behavior takes effort, as well.

Anything of value in life takes effort.  It takes work.  Growth and change are never easy, but always worth it.  Hunter also makes a point in the aforementioned book that growth requires change.  If we aren’t willing to change, we are unwilling to grow.

Be your best today; be better tomorrow.

Carpe momento.

The movie, Facing the Giants, helped me through a failing business.  I lost count how many times I watched the movie.  There are many inspiring scenes, but a favorite, among many, is the “death crawl” scene, where Coach Taylor (played by Alex Kendrick) has player, Brock Kelly (played by Jason McLeod), crawl on all fours with a player on his back.  Asked to do his absolute best, Brock responds, “What? You want me to go to the 30?”  Coach Taylor responds, “I think you can go to the 50.”  Blindfolded (so he wouldn’t give up when he could do more) and coached along the way, Brock makes it to the end-zone.  Personally, my favorite part is when Coach Taylor reminds Brock: “You just carried a 140-pound man across this field on your arms.”  The player, Jeremy, interrupts and says, “Coach,… I weigh 160.”  We must never under-estimate what we are capable of doing.  Now, I would not recommend that we try crawling 100 yards with a 140-lb man (I mean, 160-lb man) on our back—coaches, there is a thing called “rhabdomyolysis”—but, we can–if we do.

Facing the Giants is a faith-based, Christian movie, but it has a message for all.  It ends with a framed picture of Matthew 19:26 (“…with God all things are possible”).  What ever your beliefs, it is true that when we trust our path and believe in a purpose greater than self, all things are possible.  We tend give up on ourselves—to not even try.  If we fail, so what?  (My business did.)  We just have to give our “absolute best”.  I believe we will always surprise ourselves.

Be your best today; be better tomorrow.

Carpe momento!

Sticking with the movie theme….  Another favorite for inspiration is Miracle, the 2004 film about the United States men’s ice hockey victory at the 1980 Winter Olympics.  Kurt Russell starred as coach Herb Brooks.  (I personally like the 1981 version, Miracle on Ice, with Karl Malden as Coach Brooks, equally as much.)  It is not so much the movies that are inspiring, but the story itself.  It is the underdog overcoming the Goliath that inspires us—that gives us hope in our own struggles.  At the heart of defeating our impossible opponent and achieving unreasonable goals is life is believing in ourselves.  If we believe in our God-given talents and strive to do our absolute best, good things will surely come.  Maybe not victory, gold medals, or fame, but trust that what will come of our efforts will be rewarding.

I am just going to let Coach Brooks speak:

“You think you can win on talent alone? Gentlemen, you don’t have enough talent to win on talent alone.”

“All-star teams fail because they rely solely on the individual’s talent. The Soviets win because they take that talent and use it inside a system that’s designed for the betterment of the team. My goal is to beat ’em at their own game.”

“When you pull on that jersey, you represent yourself and your teammates. And the name on the front is a hell of alot more important than the one on the back! Get that through your head!”

“If we play ’em 10 times, they might win nine. But NOT this game.”

“The important thing is that those twenty boys know in twenty years, they didn’t leave anything on the table. They played their hearts out. That’s the important thing.”

“We start becoming a team right now!”

“This is your time! Now go out there and take it!”

Carpe momento!

 

Image Source: Miracle

In pursuit of inspiration, I asked my friends on social media “what is your favorite, most inspiring, sports movie and scene.”  I received a number of responses, and most popular seems to be Rudy, the 1993 film about Daniel “Rudy” Ruettiger’s dream of playing football for the Notre Dame Fighting Irish.  In my opinion, a great choice.

Rudy inspires us because it is the classic underdog story.  It is the story of an undersized kid’s will to play in arguably one of the best college football programs of the time.  Rudy strikes a nerve in all of us—perhaps because we have all likewise aspire to do something that is out our reach.  Unfortunately, we rarely accomplish what Rudy did—but the possibility remains.

My favorite scene in the movie is when he tells an offensive lineman, Mateus: “If I cool it out there, then I won’t be helping you guys win next week’s game.  Got it?”  This speaks volumes about passion and purpose.  Rudy wanted to play football not for himself (though at times—and this was most evident when he faltered—he did).  Rather he wanted to play for the Fighting Irish.  He cared less about himself and more for the team and the idea of “team.”  This is what inspires me most about this movie.

We all need an attitude of personal drive.  It is what makes us all better.  Unfortunately, there is a tendency to not push too hard as to not upset our teammates, coworkers, friends, etc.  We are afraid of making someone “look bad” or being perceived as saying that our team, program, organization, etc. is not good.  Our pushing for growth, however, does not say we are currently not good.  Pushing—driving for constant improvement—recognizes that we can always get better.

When Rudy spoke of having to “prove” himself, Fortune responded: “Oh, you are so full of crap. You’re five foot nothin’, a hundred and nothin’ and hardly have a spec of athletic ability, and you hung in with the best college football team in the land for two years, and you were also going to walk out of here with a degree from the University of Notre Dame. In this lifetime, you don’t have to prove nothing to nobody except yourself, and, after what you gone through, if you haven’t done that by now, it ain’t gonna never happen, now go on back.”  To how many of us is he speaking?  Our best efforts may not bring us everything we want, but so what.  We have to get over the idea that hard work has to be “rewarded”.  (By the way, hard work is always awarded, just not always in the ways we most desire.)  We don’t have to “prove” ourselves to anyone but ourselves.  So, let’s stop trying to please others.

Be your best today; be better tomorrow.

Carpe momento!

Image source: Rudy

Sports movies motivate me.  I do believe I could spend all my free time watching them and never be satisfied. 

I asked for inspiration.  My friend, Joe, suggested I watch Brian’s Song, which, of course, I have many times.  (And, of course, I cry every time.)  “I am third” is a daily mantra.  It did get me thinking about the effect that these movies have on me—and, certainly, others.

In the last week, I have watched: Greater, American Wrestler, and Forever Strong.  My workout mix is dominated by the soundtrack of the Rocky movies.  I could watch Rudy and Facing the Giants almost every day.  (Indeed, I watched parts of Facing the Giants several times a week when my business was struggling.)  Even the so very cheesy Karate Kid pulls at my heart strings.  The list is ginormous.

I am inspired by the underdog and the fighter.  I am motivated by people who dream unrealistic dreams and achieve them.  I see sports as a microcosm of society.  I see the solution to society’s ills in the team of misfits who come together to win against all odds.

I am motivated by coaches who inspire—in real life, as well as, fiction.  To some extent, I am jealous of the characters in the movies.  My sports careers were far from inspiring.  I have a few stories, but nothing worthy of the big screen.  Nonetheless, I am inspired to be (extra)ordinary.  I am inspired to help others achieve unreasonable goals.  I am just inspired.

They may just be movies, but they stir our emotions.  They give us something to believe in.  They give us cause to believe in ourselves.  Believe in the underdog story.

Be your best today; be better tomorrow.

Carpe momento!

“The final forming of a person’s character lies in their own hands”–Anne Frank

Heywood Brown said that “Sports do not build character. They reveal it.”  I believe this to be true.  Moreover, I believe the same about life.  Our character is revealed by the decisions we make.

My nephew recently lamented the total lack of character in American politics, and I have to agree.  Sadly, it is not confined to one party, nor is it confined to politics.  Society, on the whole, seems more impressed by reputation than true character.  As Abraham Lincoln once said, however: “Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing.”

I personally, believe that a man (or woman) is nothing if he (or she) lacks character.  Integrity is the only thing of value we take to the grave.  The lessons of character can be taught, but, ultimately, we have to decide to what kind of tree we want to be.  We decide in every moment who we will be.  Integrity is not situational, but it is revealed situationally.

I love the above quote from Ann Frank.  Parents, teachers, coaches, and friends can lead us (or not) in character, but, in the end, we decide the path we will take.  We alone own our character (or lack thereof).  We can blame no one.  To give credit where credit is due is certainly warranted, but responsibility is owned by the individual.

According to legendary rugby coach, Larry Gelwix, “if you lose your integrity, you’ve lost everything.”  The key is to have integrity to lose (and, of course, to hold on to it for dear life).

We have character and integrity through practice and habitual demonstration of character and integrity.  It does not come through providence.  It comes from the decision made in the moment (carpe momento).

If, like me, you are disgusted by the lack of character that surrounds us, then do something about it.  If the world you see lacks integrity, stand with integrity.  “Show class, have pride, and display character. If you do, winning takes care of itself” (Paul “Bear” Bryant).

Be your best today; be better tomorrow.

Carpe momento!

Anyone who takes the time to read my blog (first, thank you!), you know how much I love lists (and sarcasm).  It seems there are clear lists of what we should eat, should not eat, exercises we should be doing, exercises we should not be doing, etc.  Seemingly, these must always be lists of five.  Recently—I see these lists almost every day on social media—I have been seeing lists specific to men over the age of 50 years.  Apparently, everything goes downhill fast over 50 (or 40, depending on the list, of course).  I was inspired by these to come up with my own list.  What I am about to reveal are the secrets that experts want to keep to themselves.  I can’t keep them secret, and feel compelled to share.   So, here they are: the 5 things men over 50 need to be doing to gain muscle:
1. Lift weights.
2. Lift more weight than they did last time.
3. Eat.
4. Sleep.
5. Repeat.

Yep!  This is the big secret.  Another big secret: few men over 50 are doing this.

This is it.  Lift. Increase. Eat. Sleep. Repeat.

The only way for men over 50 to build muscle is to execute a well-planned weight lifting regimen.  Not occasionally.  Not randomly (and don’t buy into the “muscle confusion” nonsense!).

Progress.  Follow the overload principle—in order for a body system (e.g., the skeletal muscles) to adapt, it must be stressed to a level greater than that to which it is accustomed.  If you are not increasing the weights, you cannot and will not get stronger (i.e., add muscle mass).

If you want to build muscle, you need to fuel the growth.  You need to eat a well-balanced diet (including carbohydrates!) and eat enough to grow the muscle.  You cannot build muscle on a caloric deficit.  Now, if you are overfat, you will still need to cut calories to lose fat, but you can’t starve yourself.  There are no magic foods.  There are no short-cuts.

One tends to think that one grows muscle in the gym.  Quite the contrary.  Growth is stimulated in the gym (assuming you are going productive work in the gym).  Growth occurs during rest.  Now, lest you think that more rest is better, it is important to understand that it is a balance between stimulus and recovery.  This is referred to as “Maximal Recoverable Volume” (MRV, Dr. Mike Israetel).  With this in mind, consider that MRV is either not met (thus, the muscle is under-stimulated), exceeded (thus, the muscle cannot adequately recover before the next exercise session), or it is appropriately met (thus, growth is optimal).  There are no formulas for MRV.  It requires a bit of trial and error.  In general, if you are able to continue progressing from workout to workout, you are doing alright.  Most tend to fall below MRV rather than to exceed MRV.  I am guessing that, if you are 50+, you are not spending hours in the gym and are thus not overtraining.

So, if we are discussing recovery, it follows that we have to repeat the exercise with some frequency—repeat.  How often?  That depends on you.  It also depends what you are doing in your workouts.  Minimally, two sessions per week per body part are necessary.  There is evidence, however, that more frequent is permissible.  (Personally, I prefer greater frequency because I am restricted in the time I can commit to exercise sessions.  Thus, I have to spread workouts into more frequent sessions.)

Space does not permit more detailed exercise prescription here.  The possibilities are quite individualized.  It depends on goals, time, and dedication.  Let it suffice to say that you can build muscle over 50… if you want.  There are no tricks or gimmicks.  It just requires work.

Be your best today; be better tomorrow!

“You can’t always get what you want, but, if you try sometimes, well, you might find you get what you need.”—The Rolling Stones

We are overly concerned, in my humble opinion, about feelings.  We are concerned to the point that our young are so shielded from possible offense that they are not learning how to adequately stand for themselves.  Now, don’t get me wrong.  I do believe that we should not offend.  But, at the same time, we should not be easily offended. The opportunity to be offended comes often.  It is our choice to be offended or not to be.

I saw a “sponsored” video on Facebook this morning that prompted today’s comments.  The video (I didn’t watch it) offered a “3-step formula” for not getting your feelings hurt.  I am not a person for bullet-point solutions (though I am surprised that there has not been a faction of society to rise up offended by the phrase “bullet-point” and demand that it be replaced with a more politically-sensitive term).  Personally, I have a 1-step formula for not getting your feelings hurt: 1) Don’t let your feelings get hurt.  Simple.  It is a decision we are frequently asked to make.  Carpe momento.

I remember learning as a kid that “sticks and stones may break my bones, but names will never hurt me.”  When did we start to forget this??

In our ever-diversifying world, we are going to say things and have things said to us that are said of ignorance.  There is no harm intended.  No harm should be taken.  It should be a learning moment.

I carry a haunting remembrance of my own ignorance (many, in fact).  I grew up in a predominately white community.  In 12 years of public schooling, I was exposed to only a handful of persons of color and, even in college had diverse friendships only at work.  It was not until I moved to Long Island, New York that I was blessed with a diversity of close friends.  Culturally, I had a lot to learn.  Thankfully, I was loved by these friends (they were more like family), and I loved them.  On one occasion, I could easily have destroyed the bond.  I was with a group of my friends sharing in some light conversation.  Johnny started talking jive (if that is the best way to describe it—I am still sensitive about it).  He was hilarious.  I, in all my youthful ignorance, commented: “I love when you talk black.”  Silence.  And I can still see the look on the faces of my friends.  All I could do was apologize and confess that my words did not come out as I intended.  Thankfully, the color quickly returned to the faces of my friends, and they let it go.  It bothers me to this day, but I suspect that none of them even recall the incident.  This easily could have been the end of a number of great friendships—brotherhoods—that remain to this day.  I can’t say that I have perfectly mastered the art of thinking before I speak and considering how my words might be perceived (my students can attest to this), but I am more careful.  Moreover, the lesson I learned from Johnny, Eddie, Gary, John, Maurice, and any others who were present is that of forgiveness and understanding.  I do believe the event pierced me more than it pierced them.  It exposed an ignorance.  It caused me to grow.

We are going to offend.  It is a fact of life.  It follows, then, that we are going to be offended.  That is to say that the potential to offend and be offended will always be present.  It is a matter of choice whether we are offended by another’s words or actions.  In the moment, we make a decision.

When we decide to be offended, the relationship continues down a negative path.  If, on the other hand, we choice to correct the offender, let the offense roll off us, or to just walk away, we take the path of strength and “happy is he who is not easily offended.”

Carpe momento!