Month: January 2017

When it comes to fitness, there is a lot of confusion.  Why?  Because there are basic principles and no hard fast rules.  The science of exercise is limited because, frankly, it is nearly impossible to control for all possible confounding variables.

So, what is one to do?  Frankly, the best one can do in the circumstances they find themselves.

I will not be emphatic about what is “best”.  There probably is no best—other than answering the question: “What works for you?”  It is not what works for someone else.  It is not the “ultimate workout” in the latest popular fitness magazine.  Moreover, it depends on your goals—and your ability to commit to the accomplishment of these goals.

I would begin by saying that one should exercise as often as possible.  Yep.  The more time you put into training for your goals the greater the gains.  “Opportunity cost” will dictate how much and how often one exercise.

The adaptations to exercise are specific—that is, the body system makes specific adaptations to imposed demands.  The more specific one trains, ultimately, the greater the gains specific to said training.  The challenge, however, lies in the fact that most want or need to train in more than one health-related or motor skill-related component of fitness.  Without getting too involved, suffice it to say that the more general the training, the slower the rate of improvement and the less likely one is to be the best (one’s personal best) in any single area of performance.  For example, Ashton Eaton holds the world record in both the decathlon and indoor heptathlon events.  His performance in any single event would be far from a medal accomplishment.  He simply can not train sufficiently in any one event to compare with the athletes dedicated to this single event.  Such it is for us as we train for strength, endurance, speed, etc.

So, do the best with what you have to work with.  If time is a factor, train when you can fit it in.  Break up your sessions to make the most of your time.  If you have more general goals, try not to train for everything in one session.  Physiologically, you are going to work against yourself.  I recommend cardio and strength be done in separate sessions, when possible—different days or different times of the day (e.g., morning v. evening).  Split up body parts, if you have to.  Maximize where you can.  Do the best with what you have to work with.  A less-than-optimal workout is better than no workout at all.

We’ll cover more specifics over time.  I welcome questions in the comment sessions, should one more specifics addressed in a subsequent post.  Until then, be your best today; be better tomorrow.

Carpe momento!

“Know that even when you want to give up or throw in the towel, in the end it will all be worth the hard work.”—Aston Eaton

 

I believe in the interconnectedness of people.  Call it “God”.  Call it “quantum physics”.  I believe in the Spiritual.  Thus, I believe in Purpose—a divine and/or necessary role that we all play in the Universe.  As a result, I believe that we are where we need to be for this moment.

It may not feel like it is where we need to be.  It may be the last place on earth where we want to be, but it is where we need to be and/or where someone or some others need us to be.

I am reminded of Arthur Ashe’s response when, as a hemophiliac who contracted AIDS from a blood transfusion, he was asked if he ever posed the question: “Why me?”  He responded: “If I were to say, ‘God, why me?’ about the bad things, then I should have said, ‘God, why me?’ about the good things that happened in my life.”  Whatever the circumstances, trust that you are where you need to be.  Trust in the process.  Expect that good will come—no matter what the personal pain.

I may not seem like the most suitable person to speak on this topic.  While far from charmed, my life has not been wrought with challenges and despair.  I have known people who have suffered through far more than any should have to endure.  I cannot speak to their experiences.  I can, however, speak to the profound impact that these have had on me and countless others.  I am a different—a better—person because of them.

Don’t dismiss the impact that you are having on others.  Realize that our lives are weaving an intricate tapestry, the image of which has yet to be revealed.

Great or small, the events in our interconnected lives are meaningful.  They might seem meaningless at the moment, but trust in the process.

It isn’t always about us.  There may be times when we will stumble for the sake of others and vice versa.  Look neither up with jealousy or envy nor down with contempt or superiority.  Instead, look for the opportunity.  Be grateful in the moment. Carpe momento!

“Failure keeps you humble and Success keeps you glowing, but only Faith & Attitude Keeps you going.”—Arthur Ashe

I have a favorite character from the movie, Zootopia.  It is Flash, the sloth who works at the DMV (“What…do..you…call…a…three…humped…camel?”).  The slow moving, slow talking sloth reminds me to slow things down a bit—particularly when it comes to the reactions toward others.

Stephen R. Covey suggested that we expand the space between the stimulus and the response.  In other words, allow yourself a moment to consider your response.

What is the definition of a “split second”?  Answer: the time between the light turning green and a New Yorker hitting the horn.  (No offense to my New York friends!!)

How many of us are too quick to react? (My hand is up.)  The idea of expanding the space is to allow our better judgment to process before responding.  We have a choice in how we respond.  Remember: we are commander of our circumstances.  When we allow circumstances—especially those which come and go in an instant (like being cutoff on the highway)—to command our response there is a lasting negative effect.  I don’t know about you, but when I am cutoff on the highway and am not in a good place (i.e., “well-centered”), I can hold on to the offense for quite sometime.  We are best to let it go before we react.

I suspect that Flash is not so easily offended.  We, too, need to slow down and decide wisely how we will respond.  It helps when we have considered and defined our values and mission.  It further helps to visit these at the start of the day.  In addition, it takes much practice.  The more often we can insert the question, “Is how I am about to respond consistent with my values?”, between the stimulus and response, the more likely we are to respond in a way consistent with these values.

The choice is ours.  Our choice, in turn, brings with it consequences.  If we allow ourselves to react negatively, we will be set on a negative trajectory that will subsequently impact others.  There is great satisfaction in allowing an offense to slide off like an egg in a well-oiled Teflon pan.  Positive responses tend to have a compounding effect.

As you go through the day, do so from moment to moment, choosing careful how you respond to other.  Pause.  Consider.  Live according to your values and not your circumstances.

Carpe momento!

“In the space between stimulus (what happens) and how we respond, lies our freedom to choose. Ultimately, this power to choose is what defines us as human beings. We may have limited choices but we can always choose. We can choose our thoughts, emotions, moods, our words, our actions; we can choose our values and live by principles. It is the choice of acting or being acted upon.”—Stephen R. Covey

“My goal is to simply inspire others to challenge themselves and to be more active.”—James Lawrence

Today, I thought I would just go back to my exercise science roots and write a little bit about physical “well-centeredness”—more specifically, exercise goals.  We all need to have them, but they need not be the same as everyone else. 

I listened to an interview the other day with the Iron Cowboy, James Lawrence, who recently completed an astonishing fifty full Ironman distances in fifty states in fifty days!  That is a 2.4-mile (3.86 km) swim, a 112-mile (180.25 km) bicycle ride, and a marathon 26.22-mile (42.20 km) run—times 50!!  Simply unbelievable!  The physical body would seem incapable of such a feat, and, yet, it has been done.  For many, the thought of doing even a 5-km run is overwhelming.

Clearly, we are all under-achieving when it comes to what our bodies are capable of doing.  Yes, we all have limitations—whether physical, financial, or time-related.  Training for even a single Ironman Triathlon is well beyond most of our abilities.  Nevertheless, what are we doing to challenge ourselves physically?

We can always do a little more.  Even after completing the 50^th day, Lawrence recognized that he could do another, if he so desired.  We are capable of far more than any of us currently do.

I am not going to suggest that anyone do anything remotely similar to the Iron Cowboy.  I do suggest we expand ourselves some.  Commit to taking on a physical challenge to improve one’s self.

Select one fitness goal and commit to it for fifty days.  It doesn’t have to be fifty Ironman distances.  Just select an area of personal health or performance in which you want to improve, and act.  Here’s the catch:

–it has to be difficult (for you),

–it has to be specific,

–it has to be physically demanding, and

–it has to lead to some measurable physical outcome.

Feel free to share your goal and progress in the comment section.

Be your best today; be better tomorrow.

Carpe momento!

 

“You have competition every day because you set such high standards for yourself that you have to go out every day and live up to that.”—Michael Jordan

I mentioned, yesterday, that there is room for competition in the Spiritual dimension.  Personally, I really do believe that competition is spiritual.  How competition fits within our Spiritual dimension is sportsmanship.

We tend to think of competition as something that is divisive and, therefore, a negative.  We want to emphasize cooperation over competition.  The former, however, leads us to the “successful side of mediocre”, whereas the latter makes everyone better.

Don’t get me wrong.  We need to cooperate.  We need to share and work together.  When it comes to growth and universal improvement, however, competition is supreme.

When one is competitive, one is focused first on being the best he/she can be.  When performance is team-oriented one must succeed for the benefit of the team, as well as one’s self.  When individuals vie for the top spot, others are working for the same position.  Thus, each pushes to out do the other.  In the end, everyone gets better.

I have made no secret of my passion for the sport of wrestling.  I consider wrestling unique in that there are, inherently, three levels of competition—team against team (in dual meets), individual against individual, and individual against him-/herself (i.e., in making weight, conditioning, and the psychology of defeating the voices in one’s head).  In preparation, much like all sports, improvement is dependent upon one athlete pushing another.  Competition in practice makes everyone better.

Life is not unlike sports.  We need competition to drive us to do better.  Competition drives innovation.  Competition drives the economy.  If you question the benefits of competition to society, make a quick study of the comparative histories of East Germany and West Germany in the span between the end of World War II and the reunification in the 1990s.

In the Spiritual dimension, we consider competition as a driving force for a greater whole.  With a well-centered focus, competition is not a matter of one being better than another.  Rather it is a matter of being the best one can be at the moment.  It leads one to “leave everything in this room.”  If two athletes face off in an arena and give their all in the pursuit of victory, there will be but one victor, but in the end each has brought out the best in the other.  As a result, both athletes will emerge from conquest a better athlete.

Sadly, competition is not always such as this.  Unfortunately, sports have become about winning with little regard for success.  Trophies are awarded without effort.  In Talladega Nights, Ricky Bobby tells us: “If you ain’t first, your last.”  Second place finishers are disgraced.  There are winners and losers—and there is no glory in losing.

In society, the demonization of competition leads to a sense of entitlement.  Without competition there is no drive to improve.  I touched on this in ‘Leading in the Commons’.  We dare not push too hard lest we upset the status quo.  As a result, no one progresses.

I dare say that competition—healthy competition—is essential to the betterment of society.  The constant push to “be your best today; be better tomorrow” drives everyone to get better (should, of course, they likewise determine to “be better tomorrow”).

To be one’s best today that he or she might be better tomorrow is a choice.  It is a choice that requires resistance—i.e., competition.  If I aspire to be better, I must have someone or something to work against me.  As an athlete, I need a competitor who is giving 100%.  Otherwise, I have a shallow victory and see no improvement.  In practice, if one or more training partners opt to “take it easy” no athlete is challenged to improve.

I want to see my children give their all in practice.  I demand this of them not only because it will make them better, but because it is necessary for their teammates to improve.

As a university professor, I am of little value to the students if they do not participate and challenge me.  I cannot be “better tomorrow” if they do not demand everything of me today.  Likewise, if I don’t challenge them, I am nothing more than a poor excuse of an audio textbook.

Whatever our position in life, we are made better by competition.  When we “leave it all in this room”, it demands that others do the same.  The result is that everyone gets better.

Carpe momento!

“If what you did yesterday seems big, you haven’t done anything today.”—Lou Holtz

I have commented before about the role of one’s environment in one’s success and what Jim Harshaw refers to as the “environment of excellence”.  I have been thinking of this recently as I consider my children.  As parents, we, no doubt, want our children to succeed.  The questions remain, however: “How to we facilitate our child’s success?” and “How do we define ‘success’ for our children?”

Success for a parent is often limited by the parent’s own desires for their child—perhaps the parent’s desires for him/herself.  We hear the phrase: “helicopter parent”.  We see the over-involvement of parents in school, sports, and other extra-curricular activities for children.  Yes, I said it.  Parents are over-involved with their children in some areas.  They are, of course, under-involved in many of the more critical areas of maturation.

Parental over-involvement in school, sports, and other extra-curricular activities is in the performance side of these.  Too often, parents come between coaches/teachers and their child.  They are more concerned with the outcome of performance—grades, playing time, position, etc.—rather than the child’s effort and development.  I suspect most coaches and teachers rarely hear from parents: “What does my child need to work on?  How can I help.”  More importantly, these rarely hear the two simple words: “Thank you!”

As parents, we are so desperate to succeed—I mean, for our children to succeed—that we focus on specialty coaches, camps, tutors, private lessons, etc. in an effort to give our child an edge.  Thusly, we become over-involved.

We, as parents are, instead, under-involved in the areas where we should be putting the most parental effort—developing the skills necessary for the child to find his/her way in the world and determine his/her own path to success (or, I think, more aptly, “Purpose”).  These skills fall within the dimensions of “well-centered fitness”: Spiritual, Physical, Intellectual, Emotional, and Social.  Herein, we create the “environment of excellence”.

Spiritually, we want our child to recognize that he/she is not the center of the Universe.  Ironically, it is probably we parents who teach them that they are the center of the Universe by all our over­-involvement and demands that they be recognized.  Faith practices will play a role here, for many, but we also cannot neglect the need to expose our children to the concepts of “team” and “community”.

We teach our children to share, but at the same time we create a mindset of entitlement by our actions.  We tell our children: “You deserve….”  Instead, we should be teaching them that “You have to earn success.”

We need to teach our children that being a part of team requires “100% effort one-hundred percent of the time”.  That means showing up when you don’t want to and accepting your role on the team.

As a parent, I have often found myself thinking that my son or daughter should be playing this position or that position, but, other than suggesting at the start of the season what they might like to play, I shut up and let the coaches coach.  For one thing, it shows my children that the coach is in charge.  It also teaches them that they have to earn what they want.  And, in most cases, they don’t end up playing what I might suggest, but they and the team end up being quite successful.  I try to make it known to the coaches (and my child) that they will play where they are most needed.  To the child, we as parents must stress that, if you want something, you must demonstrate that you deserve it.

In teaching children that they are part of something more than themselves, we teach them to appreciate others and to encourage others.  There is room for competition in the Spiritual dimension, but competition is always focused first on being the best one can be for the whole of the team, as well as one’s self.  In addition, competition makes everyone better.

Physically, we create the environment of excellence by providing for a healthy physical environment—including a clean and peaceful home, proper diet, health care, hygiene, and physical activity.  Herein, the parents must lead by example.  We can’t demand a child not smoke or drink, while abusing these ourselves.  We cannot expect our children to have healthy eating habits, if we load our refrigerator and pantry with garbage foods.  We cannot ask our children to go outside and play or exercise, if we spend the day on the couch watching television.  The physical habits our children develop begin with us parents.  There is to be no blaming of schools for lousy school lunches and no Physical Education, if we don’t provide a better example at home!

Intellectually, we control what our children learn.  We must be involved in their education.  This can begin by not blaming teachers for the child’s poor performance in school.  Discipline is taught in the home.  Insist that your child reads (and lead by example).  Help your child with his/her homework.  (If it proves to be difficult, seek help if you must, but consider it an opportunity to learn for yourself!)  Promote education—not merely the receipt of diplomas, but, rather, the desire to learn.  If you don’t have an answer to your child’s questions, guess what?  There is a thing called the Internet and, if you are old-school, books!  Go to the library.  Look things up.  Show your child that education is important.  And, if they struggle, don’t point fingers.  Teach the child that success is his/her responsibility.  Education is an opportunity!

As parents, we all know how challenging the emotional development of the child can be.  Nonetheless, we must help the child grow in Emotional well-centeredness.  We must model appropriate emotional responses.  (This is something personally challenging to me.)  Being accountable for our own emotional responses in critical.  Let’s be truthful.  We, as parents, are going to lose our tempers now and again (and again).  Own it.  Apologize when necessary.  Explain to the child why it was wrong.  Ask them for help—give them the freedom to call you out on your inappropriate emotional responses.

Allow your child to be emotional.  “Boys don’t cry” is a horrible thing to teach one’s son.  Teach the child to know when emotional responses are appropriate/inappropriate.

Lastly, in consideration of the environment of excellence for our child, we must consider the Social dimension of well-centeredness.  Remember what Jim Rohn teaches: “you are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.”  So, if this is true for us, it is true for our children.  Know your child’s friends.  Consider with whom they play and spend their time with.  Facilitate the relationships that will best promote your child’s success—considering these dimensions of well-centered fitness.

Provide the opportunities for your child to socialize.  Participation in sports, church groups, and other clubs and extra-curricular activities are great way to enable your child to develop the relationships and experiences that will shape who they are to become.  Don’t leave it to your children, per se, to develop their own circle of peers.  You, as the parent, has a role in shaping the child’s peer group.  Of course, one cannot dictate fully who are one’s friends, but a parent can help guide the child to the better influences.

Teach your child to appreciate diversity.  That is, teach them to “love your neighbor”.  Teach the child to like others that they might be likeable.

Most importantly, give children the space to resolve their own issues.  I, personally, think schools and parents are too quick to step in to resolve conflicts.  I have strong opinions about “safe spaces” and bullying policies.  By no means do I think bullying should be tolerated.  Nor do I favor children being harmed.  I do, however, think we have to let children figure things out for themselves.  We cannot shield a child from conflict in life.  To do so is irresponsible.  We must certainly protect them, but we must ultimately give them the skills to fend for themselves.

If we truly want our children to “succeed”, we must let them become who they were created to be.  We do not decide success for them.  We do, however, cultivate success by creating the fertile soil in which they are to grow and by tending to their growth—providing the proper nutrients and weeding out those who will impede their growth.

Help them be their best today and be better tomorrow.

“Always kiss your children goodnight, even if they’re already asleep.”—H. Jackson Brown

“It’s supposed to be hard. If it wasn’t hard, everyone would do it. The hard… is what makes it great.”—Jimmy Dugan character, A League of Their Own

Everything of Purpose—everything worth doing—is going to be hard.  If something is easy, there is no reward in doing it.

Embrace the hard.  Go at life 100% one-hundred percent of the time–be your best today; be better tomorrow. 

Expect life to be difficult.  Seek the challenge.  Don’t sit back and think that good things are just going to come your way.  They won’t.

American clergyman, Gordon B. Hinckley, wrote: “Without hard work, nothing grows but weeds.”  This statement is so true.  Success is cultivated.  It requires tending and effort.  Otherwise, it is choked by invasive “weeds”.

What are goals, if not challenges?  Remember the “overload principle”?  Growth comes from progressively extending one’s comfort zone.  “No pain, no gain”, so to speak.  One must accept a “healthy margin of difficulty” to grow (Heath Eslinger).  So, to what extent are we challenging ourselves?  To what extent are we challenging those we lead?

Personally, I love the process of growth.  I like to challenge myself.  When I wrestled, I wasn’t very good—barely on the “successful side of mediocre”.  It never bothered me, though.  I just loved the work that the sport required.  I still don’t feel like I’ve had a good workout unless I am drenched with sweat.  In a match, my chances of winning increased with every period I survived without getting pinned.  Why?  Because I was better conditioned than my opponents (thanks to my coaches).  It is a hard sport.  I loved the hard.  That’s what made it great.

I don’t like easy.  I am an academic who is far from the smartest in his field of expertise.  This is okay, because I love the challenge of learning.  I personally think I teach best the subjects with which I most struggle.  It’s the hard that makes it great.

Consider what you are most passionate about.  I suspect it is something at which you have put in much effort to become successful.  Easy is not fun.  It is downright boring.

If life is feeling a bit overwhelming, pause.  Take a moment and consider the opportunities that are before you.  Shift the attitude from “I have to” to “I get to”—great advice from my friend, Coach Andy Lausier—and embrace the hard.

At the end of the day, go to sleep with gratitude and the “pleasant sense of fatigue” that comes as the reward for hard work.  In everything you do, be sure to “leave everything in this room”.  In other word, give it your all, today, and know that you will be better for it, tomorrow.

There is no satisfaction in easy.  It is the hard that makes life great.  Carpe momento!

“A winner is someone who recognizes his God-given talents, works his tail off to develop them into skills, and uses these skills to accomplish his goals.”—Larry Bird

“Joyfulness keeps the heart and face young. A good laugh makes us better friends with ourselves and everybody around us.”—Orison Swett Marden

Lighten up, folks!  Don’t take yourself to serious.  Relax and have a good laugh.

I love mornings when my kids wake up grumpy.  (Well, not really, but I do welcome the opportunity to try to make them laugh.)  Getting them to smile is one of the many things I live for.  The easy route to getting them to smile is to sternly demand that they don’t laugh.  It usually only takes a couple: “Don’t you dare laugh” commands to get their beautiful smiles to bust out of frown prison.  I don’t like to start the day with seeing my children smile.

I like to laugh.  I love to laugh.  Truth be told, it masks my fears and nervousness.  When I took up public speaking, I quickly realized that when I get nervous I crack jokes.  The more jokes I utter, the more relaxed my audience perceives me.  Little do they know, I am a nervous wreck.  I still get nervous speaking—which, as a university professor….

I love to laugh at myself.  Believe me, there is a lot of material there.  After all, we just can’t take ourselves too seriously.  Personally, I think people are much more relaxed talking with someone they can trust not to be easily offended—and taking offense seems to have become an American pastime.  In addition, when I can laugh at myself, my short comings can no longer be obstacles to my success.  I am less worried, then, about what other people think.

I love silly comedy.  I love the feeling of a good belly laugh.  I love to laugh so hard my drink comes out of my nose.  I love to laugh so hard my side hurts.

But more than I love being made to laugh, I love seeing a smile brighten the countenance of a friend.  There is a lot of pain in the world.  If, for even a moment, I can help ease someone’s pain, I have done a good thing.

I have had too many friends who have lost children to cancer and other diseases.  In all of their suffering, the smiles never left the faces of these beautiful children.  Their smiles lit up my world.  If a child facing the darkness of death can smile, I have no cause to be unhappy.

A smile can encourage the most troubled soul.  Take the time today to share your smile and to put a smile on the face of another.

Carpe momento!

“Laughter is the sun that drives winter from the human face.”—Victor Hugo

“Goals allow you to control the direction of change in your favor.”—Brian Tracy

Choices.  We always have choices.

When it comes to the circumstances in our lives, likewise, we have a choice.  We can choose to be the victim or the commander of our situations.  Of course, it is not an easy selection.

It is, of course, easiest to claim one’s self the victim—to blame.  It isn’t our fault.  Our circumstances are in control.  We can’t change things.  We are just going with the flow. Etc. Etc.

Nonsense!

We may not be able to prevent the things that happen to us or the others in our lives.  We do, however, have full control over how we respond to these.  We alone choose to have command over our actions.

I have written before that when one does not like one’s current circumstances, there are three possible choices: 1) leave, 2) change, or 3) accept.  I have come to understand that acceptance is the best option.  This taking command.  Be clear, though, acceptance is not playing the victim.  Indeed, any of these options is taking command.  To do otherwise is being a victim.

Yes.  We can leave or change, but it is better that we accept our circumstances and consider the “opportunities” that are presented.  Consider that our circumstances are for a greater good or Purpose.  It is, nevertheless, our choice.

Be grateful in your present circumstances and seek how these are to be used to help you grow and be your best today (and be better tomorrow).  You may not deserve your circumstances, but you do deserve what they can potential bring to you.  (And, to be clear, this is not more crappy circumstances!)

Grow from where you are.  Be your best today; be better tomorrow!  Carpe momento!

“Only you can control your future.”—Dr. Seuss

“Change happens by listening and then starting a dialogue with the people who are doing something you don’t believe is right.”—Jane Goodall

We don’t have to look far to find something we would like to change.  And, certainly, there will be someone with whom we don’t agree.  So, what are the options?  We can give up and succumb to the status quo.  We can fight.  Or, we can sit down to discussion with the opposition.

Too often in our society, we chose a route that takes us nowhere.  We take the “fight or flight” approach.  Neither, however, results in lasting change.  The former can never result in change.  The latter can result in change that comes only by force.  Change by force is unstable.  At best, it is temporary—until the opposition can muster the strength to overcome the suppressor.

Real and lasting change comes only with dialogue.  Change comes when we sit at the table and listen.  Sadly, we seem less willing to listen.  We demand to be heard and scream that we are entitled.  No one listens when someone yells in the ear.  If you want someone to listen…whisper.

“Seek first to understand, then to be understood.”—Stephen R. Covey