Carpe momento!!

“Every account of a higher power that I’ve seen described, of all religions that I’ve seen, include many statements with regard to the benevolence of that power. When I look at the universe and all the ways the universe wants to kill us, I find it hard to reconcile that with statements of beneficence.”—Neil deGrasse Tyson

The fifth of Lauryn Axelrod’s Ten Words: An Interspiritual Guide to Becoming Better People in a Better World is “benevolence.” Benevolence refers to the inclination to do good—to be kind.

It is hard to disagree with Neil deGrasse Tyson’s comments. However, I don’t believe that the nature of the Universe reflects a God that is not benevolent. I see a God that is intentional– a God that allows a certain harshness to our existence that we may grow to be benevolent. There is no need for acts of kindness in a world that is inherently kind.

Over the last several weeks, I have reflected and meditated on attention, acceptance, authenticity, balance, and, today, benevolence. I believe these are intentional steps toward growing toward care (which, spoil-alert, is the tenth word).

To address Neil deGrasse Tyson’s words, I consider the parent who gives their child everything they ask for. Unless we are that child who has been thusly spoiled by our parents (and if we are we are probably in denial of being spoiled), we are aware of the consequences of such parenting. Personally, I am grateful (grattitude) that my parents made me work for things and said ‘no’ quite often. I would want no more from my God that, I believe, intends good for me—“in all things God works together for the good” (Romans 8:28, NIV). This verse goes on to suggest that this is for “his purpose.” I would contend that this “purpose” is to instill benevolence and grow caring hearts.

One of the most impressive assignments I did as an undergraduate student in college was to read and write a reflection of Garrett Hardins’ essay, “The Tragedy of the Commons.” The Tragedy is that mankind lacks the benevolence to care for the Commons. To me, the “Commons” is a metaphor the Spiritual—for the concept that there is something greater than self.

In all the ways that the Universe wants to kill us, there is opportunity for benevolence, for kindness, for love.

Be your best today; be better tomorrow.

Carpe momento!!

“Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance, you must keep moving.”—Albert Einstein

The fourth of Lauryn Axelrod’s Ten Words: An Interspiritual Guide to Becoming Better People in a Better World is “balance.” It may seem like one of the easiest words in practice, but life is constantly throwing things at us to disrupt our balance—work, health, finances, relationships, etc.

“Balance”, biomechanically, is the ability to maintain posture within one’s base of support. According to Carmine’s Law, Balance = Strength + Posture.
Well-centered fitness is all about balance—Spiritual, Physical, Intellectual, Emotional, and Social (SPIES). It is in the name, after all.

So, how do we practice balance in our lives? With continuous effort. Life is, indeed, like riding a bicycle. We must keep moving to keep our balance. Balance is about making small (sometimes major) adjustments to regain our center. Journaling and mindful practices like meditation are a start. Keeping physically active with purposeful exercise and recreational physical activity need to be habitual. Conscious effort and planning in our relationships are essential. Having a “growth mindset”, Spiritually, Physically, Intellectually, Emotionally, and Socially, is keeping the “bicycle” moving.

Opportunity costs. Our efforts in life are either moving us toward our center or away from our center—toward balance or away from balance.

Initially, like learning to ride a bicycle, maintaining balance requires a great deal of effort and there will be times when we “fall.” With practice, however, balance will become more reflexive, more automatic. Keep moving forward.

Be your best today; be better tomorrow.

Carpe momento!!

“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”— Ralph Waldo Emerson 

“Authenticity is the daily practice of letting go of who we think we’re supposed to be and embracing who we are.”— Brené Brown 

“Be yourself, everyone else is already taken.”— Oscar Wilde

This week’s word from Lauryn Axelrod’s Ten Words: An Interspiritual Guide to Becoming Better People in a Better World is “authenticity.” This is a hard one. We often believe ourselves to be authentic all while wearing the façade that we think others want to see. This, I believe, is what the authors above are admonishing us not to do.

Finding our authentic self is a life-long process for most. Some figure it out earlier rather than later (and some figure it out but hide their authentic self for whatever reasons).

Trying to be someone or something other than who we are is an insult to the world and to the Creator. The world needs us to be who we are.

The second of the Ten Words is “acceptance.” To be truly authentic, we must first accept ourselves. We don’t have to like who we are per se. We can change, and we must grow. Acceptance of oneself is to embrace where we are, and authenticity is the willingness to be vulnerable and open about who we are. These are challenging but necessary actions that will prepare us for the remaining 7 Words and catalyze our growth.

Authenticity is the window that permits others to have a peek at who we really are and us to begin to grow into who we are becoming and to become.

Be your best today; be better tomorrow.

Carpe momento!!

“Our uniqueness, our individuality, and our life experience molds us into fascinating beings. I hope we can embrace that. I pray we may all challenge ourselves to delve into the deepest resources of our hearts to cultivate an atmosphere of understanding, acceptance, tolerance, and compassion. We are all in this life together.”—Linda Thompson

My meditation this week in on the second of Lauryn Axelrod’s Ten Words: An Interspiritual Guide to Becoming Better People in a Better World—acceptance. Acceptance is essential if we are to have unity and peace. The world is a fascinating collection of unique individuals.

“Unique individuals.” That sounds a bit redundant, but too often we only want individuals who are just like us. Is that an oxymoron? It has been decades since my last English course.

We need diversity—and not just Human Resources DEI—to grow and to be successful (individually and as a society).

As I ponder my acceptance of others, I am considering, not only who and what I need to accept, why ‘who’ or ‘what’ is critical to my growth and success. I would add to the Linda Thompson quote that “our collective uniqueness, our collective individuality, and our collective life experiences mold us into fascinating beings.” A celebration of personal individuality demands that we celebrate one another and accept our differences.

Be your best today; be better tomorrow.

Carpe momento!!

Attention

Acceptance

Authenticity

Benevolence

Balance

Contemplation

Creativity

Collaboration

Celebration

Care

I had the opportunity to interview interfaith and interspiritual leader and author of TEN WORDS: An Interspiritual Guide to Becoming Better People in a Better World, Lauren Axelrod on The Aging Well Podcast. It was inspiring to see the connections with “well-centered fitness.” There is a circularity as one moves through the ten words from attention to caring and back to attention. Like growth in well-centered fitness, there is an asymptote to which we are led. Putting these concepts together has inspired me (more to come on that).

In the coming weeks and months, consider how these ten words apply to your growth—Spiritually, Physically, Intellectually, Emotionally, and Socially. Note how the first five words (attention, acceptance, authenticity, benevolence, and balance) are associated with our beliefs. The second five words (contemplation, creativity, collaboration, celebration, and care) are associated with behaviors. Contemplation is the fulcrum.

Allow time in your daily meditative practices to consider how these ten words and their connection to well-centered fitness (SPIES) are working or not working to impact your growth and your efforts to…

Be your best today; be better tomorrow.

Carpe momento!!

“Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement. Nothing can be done without hope and confidence.”—Helen Keller

I woke up the other day with a palpable sense of optimism. Amid the flood of uncertainty among many in my community of friends and neighbors, I felt a sense of calm and positivity.

(Positivity is not always one of my strong suits.) It trying to understand why I felt this way, I could only attribute it to hope.

The United States has been increasingly divisive. I know many don’t think this will end, but I see opportunity. I see an opportunity for us to challenge this divisiveness and come together to make change.

We are at a crossroads. (Personally, I believe every step of life is at a crossroads—carpe momento.) We have before the path of pessimism and stagnation (the status quo) or the path of optimism and growth.

The blessing of differing views is the options for solutions. There is a lot in the world that is broken. Will we keep complaining or will we get to work? Will we keep applying band-aid solutions or will be treat the underlying problems?

Many fear that institutions will be torn down. Many likely will. This can be scary. It can also be an opportunity—an opportunity to get it right this time when we rebuild. I prefer to see the opportunity.

We can come together as United and other-centered or keep going down a path of division and entitlement. I am optimistic. I am hopeful.

Let’s ask ourselves why we disagree and what the obstacles are to having our needs met. Let us….

Be your best today; be better tomorrow.

Carpe momento!!

“The best thing to do when you find yourself in a hurting or vulnerable place is to surround yourself with the strongest, finest, most positive people you know.”—Kristin Armstrong

You see the caliber of people with whom you have surrounded yourself when you at your lows—not when you are on top. People always gather around the winner, but who is there when you lose?

My young son was handed his first defeat last night in MMA. He had an off night. He was slow to come out into the crowd who had come to support him. He had hoped he had gathered his emotions. They were impossible to contain.

Of course, he had the support of mom and dad. That should be expected. I watched the wonderful young lady who so visibly loves him as he loves her wait patiently as he spilled his emotions on my shoulder (multiple times) and his mother’s. When it was her turn, she looked at me as if to ask my permission. She didn’t say a word. She just held him.  She just let him feel. She is, what my dad would have called “a keeper.” After another hug from me and a long hug from his mom, I watched as a teammate came over, hugged him, and told him how much he is loved by his team. (There is an incredible bond among these very tough men. MMA is an individual sport, yet none of these athletes compete in isolation.) I watched the friends who came out to watch him offer my son the same love and support they shared in his two victories. I am grateful for his coaches who see the future in my son and who give me no reason to doubt that they have is long-term success and (more importantly) his well-being in mind.

While disappointment is hard, it is sometimes necessary for one’s long-term growth. Moreover, it is the light that reveals our true friends and supporter.

Defeat is sometimes a greater source for a parent’s pride. Of course, I will boast when my son wins (and there will be many more victories to come), but there is a greater sense of pride in seeing how one’s child handles disappoint. Moreover, there is greater sense of satisfaction in seeing the impact said child has on others. Seeing my son allow his vulnerability to show and to see his friends and teammates rally to fill the void was heartwarming.

Our “best” today may not measure as “success”, but these are the times that the best in others reveals itself. My son got a taste of how blessed he is last night. Such friends, coaches, and teammates are hard to come by.

Find this people in your life. Be these people in the lives of others

Thank you to the few such people in my life and to many who show up for my son.

God bless.

Be your best today; be better tomorrow.

Carpe momento!!

“Resilience is distinct from mere survival, and more than mere endurance. Resilience is often endurance with direction.”—Eric Greitens

“Endurance with direction.” I like that. We often think of resilience as merely surviving—hanging on—in times of hardship. Resilience requires a sense of Purpose. Resilient people see not only that there is light at the end of the tunnel. They proceed with confidence knowing that there is a destination at the end of the tunnel.

“Direction” is the key to resilience. Carpe momento means taking each step—no matter how difficult—with a sense of Purpose and direction.

What is challenging you in this moment? Are you asking, “Why me?” or “Why not me?” Are you seeing opportunity or a barrier? Resilience is a matter of attitude or, as I prefer to say, grattitude.

Resilience doesn’t make hardship easier, but hardship does make resilient people stronger.

Be your best today; be better tomorrow.

Carpe momento!!

“A life is not important except in the impact it has on other lives”—Jackie Robinson

Bam! What an insightful statement by the great Jackie Robinson. Having a positive impact on the lives of others is one of my key values and a part of my mission statement. When an activity—job, volunteer activity, relationship, etc.—begins to lose its impact, it is time for change.

We all reach moments when the things that once felt meaningful start to feel mundane. Maybe it’s a career that no longer lights that inner fire or a friendship that has become routine rather than enriching. Recognizing this shift is critical because the ripple effect of our actions extends far beyond our immediate surroundings. Each connection, each opportunity to share knowledge, encouragement, or even kindness, adds to the collective well-being of our world.

When I find myself questioning the impact I’m making, I use it as a signal to evaluate where I am and where I want to go. This doesn’t mean abandoning responsibilities at the first sign of frustration but reflecting deeply on the why behind my actions. Am I growing? Are the people around me thriving? Is this relationship, career, or pursuit serving not just my needs but contributing positively to others?

For me, the answer to these questions dictates the next steps. Whether it means pivoting to a new project, seeking out ways to reinvigorate a current role, or even learning to let go of things that no longer serve a higher purpose, this process of reflection allows me to live with intention. Living intentionally means recognizing that time is a limited resource and that how we spend it—who we spend it with—matters greatly.

The courage to embrace change is a key part of maximizing impact. This is not about chasing fleeting goals or abandoning ship at the first sign of struggle. Instead, it’s about aligning your efforts with your mission: to lift others and leave the world better than you found it. Jackie Robinson wasn’t just talking about grand gestures or world-changing moments—he was speaking to the small acts of kindness, guidance, and mentorship that transform lives in ways we may never fully comprehend.

When you live with purpose and intentionally seek out opportunities to positively influence others, you create a legacy that outlasts you. It’s not just about being busy; it’s about being impactful.

So, next time you feel the weight of stagnation creeping in, ask yourself: Is this still where I make my greatest impact? If not, it’s time to shift course and create a new path toward meaningful influence. In doing so, you will….

Be your best today; be better tomorrow.

Carpe momento!!

“That’s not in our DNA.” This is a common organizational metaphor. Heck, we often say this as individuals. It is often an excuse not to change.

Just like our physical DNA is not quite stagnate, so too is our metaphorical DNA capable of modification. No doubt there are aspects of our organizations and selves that cannot change—those things that make us unique (physically, this would be things like eye color, etc.). Nevertheless, the genes (physical or metaphorical) that affect how we function can be affected by our environment. In biology, this is referred to as “epigenetics”—the study of how environmental factors and behaviors can cause changes to gene activity without altering the DNA sequence. Pretty cool stuff, in my opinion.

So, metaphorically, our organizational DNA (and individual “DNA”) can be and will be affected by our environment and the choices we make—how we respond to the environment or circumstances affecting us. Biology is teaching us that we have some level of control over physical functioning. The social sciences have known this for years.

What I find most fascinating about epigenetics is how our interactions with the environment affect not only our DNA and function but also the functioning of our children and grandchildren. It isn’t much of a leap to extend this to the organizational DNA metaphor.

I am in academics, so I have seen the impact of this organizational DNA metaphor. I have seen the positive and the negative “methylations” of university DNA with attempts to change (or resistance to change). I have the current opportunity to serve on a transitional team with my church. It was an aha moment when the topic of DNA was brought by the moderator and my physiologist brain connected this to my current interest in epigenetics. Understanding the significance of our (metaphorical) DNA—who we are at our very core—is an important consideration in the process of change. Likewise, the metaphor of epigenetics plays a critical role in our capacity to grow and function more effectively. We must consider what can and needs to be “upregulated/downregulated” or “turned on/off” to function (i.e., survive) in the current environment. Physically, function and dysfunction are controlled by the epigenetics of our DNA. Organizationally, it is no different.

So, if we are going to adapt to an ever-changing environment, we must refine our decision making. We must take control of our “DNA” and recognize how we need to function more effectively to survive. Daily reflection and introspection are critical to personal growth (just like frequent needs and process assessments are critical to well-functioning organizations.

We are not the victims of our DNA. Such an attitude dooms one in a changing environment—in a changing world. Instead, we need to consider how our uniqueness can be tweaked to….

Be your best today; be better tomorrow.

Carpe momento!!